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Tag: Jeff Gordon

  • The Final Word – With all the rain and challenges at Bristol, the only guy missing was Jeff Probst

    The Final Word – With all the rain and challenges at Bristol, the only guy missing was Jeff Probst

    Bristol. Just about the only thing missing was Jeff Probst and his Tribal Council as this turned into a game of survival. With the rains that delayed the start, the rains that stopped it again and again, the day race that ran into night became a reality show of its own.

    Take Kevin Harvick, for instance. He led 186 of the eventual 511 laps, but at Lap 310 he slid into a wrecked David Ragan and he found himself voted off the island in 38th place. If not Harv, then it was Kurt Busch in a dominant car. With eight to go, he took the brunt of it when Jeff Gordon got into Carl Edwards. Busch at least managed a 15th for his troubles.

    Then there was the case of Team Penske. You know you needed a hidden immunity idol when things go down the outdoor commode during the opening credits. Brad Keselowski wobbled and that allowed teammate Joey Logano to put out both their torches. Thirty-fifth and beyond was their fate.

    Do you want more examples? After the Penske wreck on the 19th lap, it rained some more. In that time, Denny Hamlin’s stiff neck got worse and when they restarted 18-year-old Erik Jones found himself racing a Cup car for the very first time, ending up 26th.

    How good was Dale Earnhardt Jr.’s car? We will never know, as a flat tire took him off the lead lap early, never to be seen again. At least he got 16th when it was all over. As for Austin Dillon, the extra laps before the final re-start ran him out of gas, but even with that he finished 10th.

    After a final caution, they needed a green-white-checker, but rain even delayed that, hence those extra caution laps before the fall of the final green. Matt Kenseth got a fine re-start to take a race he was not all that noticeable in, but the victory shows up just fine in the standings. After no wins last season, his 32nd career triumph had to be sweet no matter how he got it. Jimmie Johnson’s car did not look that pretty, but he came back to slip by Gordon for second while Jeff rebounded from a flat that had him down early to grab third. In short, these boys survived. Nobody thrived.

    Some folks play the game and slip in under the radar. Tony Stewart was sixth Sunday night, but that was a gift for to a guy who was 15th best at best. Danica Patrick was ninth. Another gift. Ricky Stenhouse Jr. was fourth, the best gift of all. Despite that good fortune, Roush-Fenway entries are still coming up short. Trevor Bayne was 28th, Greg Biffle 30th.

    Ryan Newman, fifth at Bristol, got 25 points back from his appeal over Tiregate. He still is missing his crew chief and two other team members due to suspension, and Richard Childress will continue his quest for their early return with a further appeal.

    It meant jack squat to see Logano win the Saturday XFINITY race at Bristol. Having Daniel Suarez (23 year old from Mexico), Chris Buescher (22), Erik Jones (18), Ty Dillon (23) and Chase Elliott (19) take the next five spots meant everything.

    Sunday we had the day long 2015 Food City 500 In Support of Steve Byrnes. For the NASCAR family, the broadcaster and his fight against cancer, is what truly is meaningful. We have tallied the vote, the tribe has spoken, we want you back just as soon as you are able, Steve.

  • Matty’s Picks 2015: Bristol – Part 1

    Matty’s Picks 2015: Bristol – Part 1

    It has been a couple weeks since you’ve heard from me, and I couldn’t pick a better track to make my return on. Not only is it one of the best venues on the NASCAR Sprint Cup Series circuit, but its one of the best venues in all of sports. From the 160,000 seats, to the extreme banking, to the tiny pit stalls, to the extreme speeds for a short track, Bristol is a bucket list race for any NASCAR fan, despite the claims that the racing was ruined in 2007 when the track was re-paved and progressive banking added. If you’re a fan of racing, Bristol Motor Speedway is on your list.

    I watched my first race at Bristol Motor Speedway in August of 2002, amongst a sold out crowd of over 150,000 when I watched Jeff Gordon execute the bump and run on Rusty Wallace with three laps remaining in the Sharpie 500. I happened to be sitting with a Rusty Wallace fan at the time, who was not happy with the move, but later on admitted if the roles were reversed, Wallace would have done the same thing. It’s just the way things went back then, if you were not on the bottom, you were losing positions. With the progressive banking, drivers are using all parts of the track to improve their position. The top side can be as good as the bottom, and the middle groove offers a safe haven for drivers with ill-handling cars that will not make it to the bottom or for those without the courage to run up next to the wall.

    I will save you all the grief of reading through my last few weeks of finishes, and let you know that I am sitting fourth in the CNY Sports Fans group and 12,044th on the FoxSports Fantasy Auto Leaderboards. I will let you know that I’ve finished second and third the last two weeks on my trek out of the basement.

    (more…)

  • Hot 20 heading to Bristol – Even being among the Lukewarm 30 would be beneficial for Tony

    Hot 20 heading to Bristol – Even being among the Lukewarm 30 would be beneficial for Tony

    Our Hot 20 is a look at those in contention to slip into one of the sixteen Chase spots. A win while in the Top 30 in points could prove to be just as good. Neither matters at the moment for Tony Stewart. Sadly, 2015 has been a year Smoke has been a participant, not a competitor.

    Even Kurt Busch, suspended for the first three events, should make this list in another week or two. Ryan Newman is outside, but we all know why that is. Roush-Fenway cars have been duds most of the season, which explains Ricky Stenhouse Jr. and Trevor Bayne. Kyle Larson missed one race to mend, but even if he had run there is no certainty it would have been enough. As for Sam Hornish Jr., he was 12th at Daytona, outside the Top 20 ever since.

    To be taken seriously, a driver really should at least average a 25th place finish week in and week out. That is just 684 points over the course of a season, just 19 each week. Twenty-eight drivers managed the feat in 2014, ranging from Kevin Harvick on top, down to what’s her name. They competed, the rest participated.

    Twenty-six have done it thus far in 2014. Stenhouse, Hornish and Stewart are not amongst them. While a win is not crucial just yet, it would solve a lot of ills. Just ask Kurt how that worked out for him last year.

    Hot 20 heading to Bristol…

    1. Kevin Harvick – 2 Wins (306 Points)
    A slump is finishing eighth at Martinsville. His boss would love that kind of hard luck.

    2. Jimmie Johnson – 2 Wins (216 Points)
    Sure, points are nice, but wins are better.

    3. Joey Logano – 1 Win (280 Points)
    Gets those Duke boys to help him launch new sponsor (Autotrader).

    4. Brad Keselowski – 1 Win (246 Points)
    The Captain has to be happier than the Skipper…two sweet ships and not a Gilligan in sight.

    5. Denny Hamlin – 1 Win (205 Points)
    Denny’s loves Denny. What’s next, Chick-fil-A for Danica? Taco Bell for Michael?

    6. Martin Truex Jr – 266 Points
    Like Harvick and Logano, going for eight straight in the Top Ten this season.

    7. Kasey Kahne – 230 Points
    Loves his tires, just not as wheely, wheely loose as they were at Texas.

    8. Dale Earnhardt Jr – 213 Points
    Going round and round is not pointless for Junior.

    9. Aric Almirola – 195 Points
    Smithfield Pork is the sponsor in the Food City 500. I’m sensing a theme here.

    10. David Ragan – 194 Points
    Would he be just as finger lickin’ good back in the No. 34?

    11. Jamie McMurray – 193 Points
    After showing off the new digital dashboard, hopes to dash to victory lane on Sunday.

    12. Matt Kenseth – 189 Points
    If you want a sure thing to make the Chase, Matt is as good as it gets.

    13. Jeff Gordon – 186 Points
    If Jeff is old I might as well go ahead and make my appointment with the undertaker.

    14. Carl Edwards – 182 Points
    A definite Bristol contender, a season changer if he can pull it off.

    15. Casey Mears – 178 Points
    Is getting by with a little help from his alliance friends.

    16. Paul Menard – 177 Points
    Runs better with an engine than in a soap box derby entry.

    17. Danica Patrick – 176 Points
    Not good enough to draw rave reviews just yet, but it sure beats 28th.

    18. Clint Bowyer – 168 Points
    Still in the hunt despite a Rodney Dangerfield kind of season.

    19. Greg Biffle – 165 Points
    If the Biff is suffering, imagine how teammates Stenhouse and Bayne are feeling.

    20. A.J. Allmendinger – 161 Points
    In 2007, at this track, in this race, A.J. made his Cup debut.

  • NASCAR Top-10 Power Rankings: Texas

    NASCAR Top-10 Power Rankings: Texas

    Note: The quotes in this article are fictional.

    1. Kevin Harvick: Harvick finished second at Texas, earning his ninth runner-up finish in his last 10 races. He leads the Sprint Cup points standings by 26 over Joey Logano.

    “Jimmie Johnson and I have won four of seven races this season,” Harvick said. “Johnson’s win at Texas supports the notion that the Sprint Cup championship is a two-man battle, and I ‘seconded’ that.

    “I visited The Masters on Thursday in support of my friend Scott Harvey, who’s an amateur. I took my Stewart-Haas Chevy with me. Every time Scott hit a shot, I said ‘4!’”

    2. Jimmie Johnson: Johnson took the lead for good with 14 laps to go, passing Kevin Harvick and Jamie McMurray, to win the Duck Commander 500 at Texas Motor Speedway.

    “Nothing’s more satisfying that putting on a cowboy hat and firing off a few rounds from a six-shooter,” Johnson said. “It’s a feeling that’s hard to describe unless you’re Kurt Busch, who would no doubt say he felt like an ‘assassin.’ And he knows.

    “But I’m not a big fan of ten-gallon hats. I prefer my volume measured in ‘Cups,’ and seven is the quantity I’m looking for.”

    3. Joey Logano: Logano led 19 laps and finished fourth in the Duck Commander 500, posting his third top-five result of the season.

    “Kurt Busch won his second pole of the season,” Logano said. “In Kurt’s world, winning the pole again is known as getting ‘reinstated’ to the first starting spot.”

    4. Brad Keselowski: Keselowski joined Penske Racing teammate Joey Logano, who finished fourth, in the top five with a fifth in the Duck Commander 500.

    “It was a very uneventful race,” Keselowski said. “Unlike November’s race in Texas, nothing happened. Call it a ‘ho humdinger.’ Even the boredom was Texas-sized. Had the race last November been called the Duck Commander 500, maybe it would have done me some good. With all the shoves and punches flying at me then, a ‘duck’ call surely would have helped.”

    5. Martin Truex Jr.: Truex finished ninth in the Duck Commander 500, giving him six top 10’s in the season’s first seven races. He stands third in the points standings, 50 behind Kevin Harvick.

    “There’s another ‘Junior’ making news,” Truex said. “Apparently, Danica Patrick would say ‘yes’ if Ricky Stenhouse Jr. would propose. That puts Ricky in a truly awkward predicament. Now, it seems both Patrick and Stenhouse are in ‘no-win’ situations.”

    6. Dale Earnhardt Jr.: Earnhardt came home third on a strong day for Hendrick Motorsports, which placed four drivers in the top seven. Earnhardt is seventh is the points standings, 93 out of first.

    “Rick Hendrick couldn’t be happier,” Earnhardt said. “Unlike a Richard Childress Racing tire, Rick’s ego is fully inflated.

    7. Kasey Kahne: Kahne finished eighth in the Duck Commander 500 after starting fourth and leading six laps.

    “Did you see Michael Waltrip standing atop Texas Motor Speedway’s giant video monitor?” Kahne said. “Michael looked a little wobbly up there, but then again, when has Michael ever been that sure of his ‘orientation.’”

    8. Jeff Gordon: Gordon finished seventh at Texas as all four Hendrick Motorsports drivers finished in the top seven.

    “I really wanted to win in Texas,” Gordon said. “That would have been the perfect going away present. As it was, Jimmie Johnson won ‘going away.’”

    9. Denny Hamlin: Hamlin finished 11th at Texas, one spot behind Joe Gibbs Racing teammate Carl Edwards in 10th. Hamlin is seventh in the points standings.

    “This race was called the ‘NRA 500’ in 2013,” Hamlin said. “That was a scary day, especially for the No. 42 Target car.

    “Michael Waltrip dropped a taco on my car before the race. It wasn’t a big deal to me. It’s one thing to have hot sauce on your Toyota; it’s another to have hot sauce in your Toyota. Michael did; it was called ‘jet fuel.’”

    10. Jamie McMurray: McMurray finished sixth in the Duck Commander 500, scoring his third top-10 finish of the year.

    “Wow!” McMurray said. “There were stars of the ‘Duck Dynasty’ show in Victory Lane. I really would have loved to win this race so I could have met the one and only Willie Robertson. That way, the ‘McDaddy’ could have met the ‘Quack Daddy.’”

  • The Final Word – Texas was all about Jimmie and Kevin with a Junior cameo

    The Final Word – Texas was all about Jimmie and Kevin with a Junior cameo

    Jimmie, and Kevin, and Dale, oh my. Jimmie, and Kevin, and Dale, oh my.

    Last Saturday night was a good one if you happened to be a fan of one of the above-mentioned drivers. Johnson was the class of the field, leading 128 laps, including the final one. It was his second win of the season and the 72nd of his career. Six-time rather likes the Texas track, having won the last three fall races, now four in his last six attempts, and his fifth win overall in Fort Worth. I am starting to think he likes the place.

    Kevin Harvick, also with a pair of victories this season along with four runner-up finishes, led 96 laps and came home second. Life must be good when finishing eighth at Martinsville represents a slump. As for Junior, well, Mr. Earnhardt led zero laps but he was close, closer still near the end, to claim third. If he could only get a mulligan for both Phoenix and Martinsville, for he has finished between third and sixth everywhere else.

    Another good day as well for the likes of Joey Logano and Brad Keselowski, as the Penske duo finished in the Top Five. Proof positive you can get away with being a two car operation if those teams actually matter. Same goes for single car outfits, as Martin Truex Jr. now has a Top Ten in each race of this season, a huge turnaround from a year ago. As for the likes of Tony Stewart and Sam Hornish Jr, nothing much to write home about regarding this race or this season. Maybe this weekend things will be different. Probably not.

    Maybe they could join the rest of us, experiencing success at home driving a video game version. Next month the new NASCAR ‘15 game comes out. Of course, for me, realism is being able to switch to indestructible mode in order to take out the entire field en route to victory. Hey, it could happen in real life. Having cars flying a hundred feet into the air, now that was unrealistic.

    Unrealistic, like me growing taller, or having my hair back, or holding out hope that one day I might actually become a Cup driver. If I could just shed 60 pounds and 40 years, I could be Erik Jones. You might as well become familiar with the 18-year-old, who is registered in the trucks. All he has done there is win four of his career 20 events, with 16 Top Tens. When he was 16 and 17, he ran ARCA, winning one of 14 with eight Top Tens. Oh, Jones also runs Xfinity, winning his first in nine attempts last weekend to go with six Top Tens. Joe Gibbs did not want to rush him into Cup, going with David Ragan instead of Jones to fill in for Kyle Busch. Even though Ragan sits 10th in the standings, maybe they might want to re-think that. The man child might be ready.

    We are always ready for a day at Bristol, where Jimmie and Kevin and Dale have all won. Once. Jimmie won it five years ago while 10 have gone by for the other two. Kurt Busch and Jeff Gordon each have five, but a few years have ticked by even for them.

    No, your best bet would be Carl Edwards. Winner of three, including the event one year ago, he did pick up his first Top Ten last Saturday. Maybe it is his time to shine this season though if he falters I am sure teammates Matt Kenseth and Denny Hamlin would be more than willing to pick up the slack. Both are also past Bristol winners.

    As for some Bristol trivia, there were 56 races run at that track between 1973 and 2000. Thirty of those, more than half, were won by Cale Yarborough (9), Darrell Waltrip (12), Dale Earnhardt (9), and Rusty Wallace (9). Hall of Famers all. Oh my, indeed.

  • Surprising and Not Surprising: Duck Commander 500

    Surprising and Not Surprising: Duck Commander 500

    For the first night race under the vast Texas lights, here is what was surprising and not surprising from the 19th annual Duck Commander 500.

    Surprising: This race featured a surprising number of penalties for driving through more than three pit boxes, surpassing the previous most popular penalty in the season to date for uncontrolled tires. There were a total of four such driving through pit box penalties, including ones for Denny Hamlin, Trevor Bayne, Kyle Larson and Casey Mears.

    Hamlin was able to rebound to finish eleventh, Bayne took the checkered flag in the 18th position, Kyle Larson finished a disappointing 25th and Casey Mears ended the race in the 27th spot.

    “To be realistic, we need stuff to go our way,” Hamlin said after the race. “We need cautions and track position. We just can’t drive through the field like that – what those guys are capable of – and we’re a work in progress.”

    Not Surprising: After waking up with a cold and practically no voice, it was not surprising that Jimmie Johnson needed a little assist from Willie Robinson from Duck Dynasty, title sponsor of the race, to lift high the massive Texas trophy.

    “Just a great, great race car,” Johnson said. “We just kept plugging at it and I think the off-week was good for us to sit down and relax, reboot and come back to the track. They brought me a fast race car that was good all weekend.”

    The win signified Johnson’s fifth victory at Texas but his first ever win in the spring race and was also his 72nd victory in 478 Cup Series races.

    Surprising: Hendrick Motorsports teammates Dale Earnhardt Jr. and Kasey Kahne had something in common that they both most likely wished they did not share. Both had a whole lot of shaking going on, with vibrations and loose wheels abounding.

    Yet in spite of all that shaking and vibrating going on, both drivers managed good finishes, with Earnhardt in third and Kahne finishing eighth.

    “It’s good to get a good finish in the bank because these last few weeks have been pretty rough, but we know what we are capable of,” Junior said. “Greg (Ives, crew chief) and I are just getting started here and we are right there on their heels man. If we ever get this thing figured out – it’s going to be tough.”

    “There were times when I felt really competitive with the leaders and other times more like a fifth-place car,” Kahne said. “We just left too many wheels loose throughout the race. I think three; you can’t run well when you do that.”

    Not Surprising: While Brad Keselowski had a close encounter of the cone kind, he was able to rally back to score a top-five finish for Team Penske.

    “I was trying to make my mind up and chose poorly,” Keselowski said when asked about the commitment cone violation. “But it was still a great day for the Miller Lite Ford and we have a lot to be proud of.”

    Keselowski’s Penske teammate Joey Logano also had a strong run, finishing fourth in his No. 22 Shell Pennzoil Ford.

    Surprising: Oops, he did it again. Yes, Kevin Harvick again finished in the second spot in the No. 4 Budweiser/Jimmy John’s Chevrolet. In fact, this was the eleventh time that Jimmie Johnson and Kevin Harvick have finished one/two in a race and it was also Harvick’s seventh top-10 finish in 2015.

    “I just got behind there and Jimmie was fast for those last couple laps and got around us,” Harvick said. “I got loose coming off four and I got in the wall and just was trying to hang on to where I needed to be. We just raced as hard as we could and it was a lot of fun.”

    Not Surprising: Carl Edwards finally got he wanted and expected after leaving Roush Fenway Racing for Joe Gibbs Racing this season. He got his first top-10 finish with his new No. 19 Stanley Racing For A Miracle Toyota.

    “I wanted to make a statement,” Edwards said. “It’s not a win, but for us it is our first top-10 and we dug hard all day, and we had a lot of fun. It’s a good race track.”

    Surprising: Aric Almirola, who did double duty at Texas racing XFINITY and Cup, may have finished 19th but he has managed to stay firm in his top ten ranking in the point standings.

    In fact, the driver of the Richard Petty Motorsports famed No. 43 held steady in the ninth spot of the point positions and would be considered a Chase contender if that competition started after this most recent race.

    Not Surprising: A two tire gamble was the key for many of the drivers who rounded out the top-ten in the finishing order.

    Jamie McMurray, who finished sixth; Jeff Gordon, who finished seventh; and Martin Truex, Jr., who kept his top-10 streak alive with a ninth place run, all took just two tires at the final stop of the race.

    “We did two (tires) two other times in the race and it worked out really well for us,” McMurray said. “When I cleared the No. 24 (Jeff Gordon) I thought we had a legitimate shot at winning. But once the guys with four tires got clear their cars were a little better than ours and they had better tires. You just can’t hold them up here.”

    “Yeah that was a great gamble, great call by Alan (Gustafson, crew chief) and we saw early some guys take two tires and made it work for a short period of time,” Gordon said. “Alan made a great call there at the end to take two tires and that is what got us to seventh.”

    “At the end we had to start doing some strategy stuff to get our track position back and probably gave up a few spots doing it,” Truex Jr. said. “I think it was the right call. We’re taking some gambles and they’ve been paying off.”

    “It was still a top 10, so all in all, it was a good night for us.”

    Surprising: Both Paul Menard and Ryan Blaney checked into the engine heartbreak hotel, finishing respectively after having engine issues.

    “We broke a water hose, I guess,” Menard said after being sidelined with mechanical issues as lap 222. ”The main line that goes in the motor just broke. It pushed a bunch of water out. No warning. The temperature gauge never moved. I was coming down the backstretch to pit and was slowing down and it broke. We popped the hood but couldn’t see anything. So, we went back out but then had no power.”

    “The bright side is I feel like we had a really good car,” Jeremy Bullins, crew chief of the No. 21 Wood Brothers Motorcraft/Quick Lane Ford Fusion driven by Ryan Blaney, said. “Obviously, something happened with the engine. I’m not sure exactly what because it’s hard to tell what happened first, so we just got to the point where we couldn’t keep going.”

    “It’s unfortunate. We’ve got a lot of power, so we won’t complain and we’ll go on and get ready for the next one.”

    Not Surprising: David Ragan continued his run as the happiest replacement driver on the race track, bringing his usually driven by Kyle Busch No. 18 Interstate Batteries Toyota to a 13th place finish after qualifying 30th.

    “Our overall race was really good considering where we started at,” Ragan said. “We didn’t have the best pit stall selection, we were having to drive around cars all night. Adam Stevens (crew chief) and our Interstate Batteries team did a really nice job adjusting on our Camry and I felt like we had a chance at a certainly a top-10 or maybe even a top-five if the cautions would have fell right.”

    “We just weren’t at our best the last 50 laps,” Ragan continued. “I think we learned a few things and certainly overcame a poor qualifying effort.”

    “Not too excited about our finish, very pleased with our race.”

     

  • Hot 20 – Texas awaits as our thoughts are with a broadcaster back in the hospital

    Hot 20 – Texas awaits as our thoughts are with a broadcaster back in the hospital

    A week of rest, a week of contemplation, a week for those of faith. I so desperately pray that miracles do happen. Pit reporter Steve Byrnes is back in the hospital in his fight against neck and head cancer. He is in the ICU with pneumonia and a blood clot in his lung. At least he was able to tweet that information himself. This, more than anything I have written here, is the most meaningful and important. I could use some faith restoration about now. How about you?

    Kyle Larson missed Martinsville as doctors sought out a cause for his fainting at an event prior to the race. Today, they have the luxury to err on the side of caution as an injury no longer automatically means a championship run is done. This reduced pressure to race also means an injured driver no longer needs to feel compelled to climb back into the seat much too soon to keep his hopes alive. Even a suspension does not spell the end, as Kurt Busch sits a win away from proving. While it might be a trial for Kyle Busch to make the Chase with a win and Top 20 spot when he returns, Larson should be fine as Denny Hamlin was last season. He missed Fontana, yet finished 2014 in third.

    The National Network to End Domestic Violence is not happy Kurt Busch is back racing. To be honest, I believe there are more serious matters for them to hang their shingle. In this case, we had a questionable incident based on the opinion of a single Delaware judge from the questionable comments of two people over an incident in which little, if any, physical harm was caused. I applaud their vigilance, but I do question their bid to use this case as their cause celebre. For me, the issue has turned out to be more pathetic than violent.

    It has been announced that Cup regulars Aric Almirola and Sam Hornish Jr. will run even more XFINITY series events than they originally planned. It makes it easier to explain why some of us could not be bothered covering major leaguers kicking minor league butt week after week, season after season. Twenty-one-year-old Ryan Reed won at Daytona. Cup guys have won the other five, with Kevin Harvick taking two. Enough said.

    At least Chase Elliott won the spring XFINITY race in Texas a year ago. He is not a Cup regular just yet. As for the big boys…and girl…here are the…

    Hot 20 going down to Texas…

    1. Kevin Harvick – 2 Wins (263 Points)
    It wasn’t his tires up there on the Grassy Knoll.

    2. Joey Logano – 1 Win (239 Points)
    Won two weeks ago Saturday, third on that Sunday.

    3. Brad Keselowski – 1 Win (206 Points)
    Bloody Keselipski, according to the billboards in Texas.

    4. Denny Hamlin – 1 Win (172 Points)
    Only tire issues he had at Martinsville were during his burnout.

    5. Jimmie Johnson – 1 Win (168 Points)
    Won last three fall races in Fort Worth, but was 25th last spring.

    6. Martin Truex Jr – 231 Points
    It is nice when all one’s ducks and furniture is all in a row.

    7. Kasey Kahne – 193 Points
    Best Hendrick driver, by points, is ole what’s his name.

    8. Paul Menard – 173 Points
    Once one of two Childress drivers in the Hot 20…then Newman got tired, so to speak.

    9. Dale Earnhardt Jr – 172 Points
    According to Gordon, Junior doesn’t know squat…jumps.

    10. Aric Almirola – 170 Points
    More XFINITY for him, less seat time for others.

    11. Matt Kenseth – 168 Points
    Fort Worth is Matt’s kind of town.

    12. David Ragan – 163 Points
    Kyle Busch? I don’t know. The names does sound rather familiar, though.

    13. Casey Mears – 161 Points
    500-1 to win at Texas? Really? Is he driving it or running it?

    14. Jamie McMurray – 154 Points
    Claims he and Larson are ego free. I am hair free, but you don’t hear me bragging.

    15T Jeff Gordon – 148 Points
    Soft start followed by a trio of Top Tens.

    15T Danica Patrick – 148 Points
    From what we saw in the last race, Virginia really is for lovers…of Danica.

    15T Carl Edwards – 148 Points
    Has a million very good reasons to race for the win Saturday night.

    18. Clint Bowyer – 146 Points
    Truex left, Bowyer stayed. I wonder who got the best of that deal?

    19T A.J. Allmendinger – 138 Points
    Bush’s Beans is the sponsor. You wouldn’t want to be running behind him.

    19T Greg Biffle – 138 Points
    Has led at least a lap in 12 of the 20 Texas races he has run.

  • NASCAR Top-10 Power Rankings: Martinsville

    NASCAR Top-10 Power Rankings: Martinsville

    Note: The quotes in this article are fictional.

    1. Kevin Harvick: Harvick finished eighth at Martinsville, ending his streak of eight consecutive results of second or better. He remains atop the Sprint Cup points standings, 24 ahead of Joey Logano.

    “It was a disappointing finish,” Harvick said. “Not that eighth is bad, but I finished behind Danica Patrick. I guess my son Keelan’s cries of ‘Go Daddy!’ were heard by Danica and not me.”

    2. Joey Logano: Logano started on the pole at Martinsville and came home third, leading 108 laps in the STP 500. He is second in the points standings, 24 behind Kevin Harvick.

    “That race had it all,” Logano said. “Action, intrigue, fake cautions, you name it. Plus, there was controversy, because track management dumped Jesse Jones hot dogs for Valleydale. How could they? I’ve been called one, but this takes the term ‘undeserving weiner’ to a new level.”

    3. Brad Keselowski: Keselowski stalked Denny Hamlin over the final laps at Martinsville but couldn’t make the pass. Hamlin took the checkers while Keselowski settled for second.

    “The No. 2 Miller Lite was fast,” Keselowski said, “and I almost pulled it out. And that would have been nice. Had I won, you could have said the race itself, much like Kyle Larson, was ‘Lite-headed.’”

    4. Martin Truex Jr.: Truex led 23 laps and finished sixth at Martinsville, posting his sixth top 10 of the year. He is third in the points standings, 32 behind Kevin Harvick.

    “Kyle Larson missed the race after fainting Saturday at an autograph session,” Truex said. “Apparently, he signed ‘out.’ Don’t ask me what his condition is, because I don’t have the faintest. Somebody told me Fall Out Boy was signing autographs on Saturday. Turns out it was just Kyle Larson.”

    5. Dale Earnhardt Jr.: Earnhardt suffered a broken shifter early at Martinsville and was involved in a multi-car wreck on lap 228 that smashed the front end of the No. 88 Chevrolet. He eventually finished 36th, 47 laps behind.

    “Obviously,” Earnhardt said, “you can’t do shift without a shifter. And if you can’t change gears, a sorry finish becomes, well, ‘automatic.’

    “After a lengthy stint in the garage, the No. 88 returned to the track without a hood. That is, of course, bad news, but it comes with a silver lining. Trust me, when anything Earnhardt-related goes topless, I thank the lucky starts it’s the car and not one of my fans.”

    6. Jimmie Johnson: Johnson, an eight-time winner at Martinsville, suffered numerous issues at Martinsville on his way to a 35th-place finish.

    “My day at Martinsville had a lot in common with Chad Knaus’ history with the NASCAR rule book,” Johnson said. “There were ‘multiple issues.’

    “I’ve won eight times at Martinsville. Normally, when I race there, I say “Hot dog.’ Not on Sunday. I spent so much time with the hood up, there was no ‘hot dog,’ just ‘all the fixings.’”

    7. Kasey Kahne: Kahne finished 11th in the STP 500 as Hendrick teammate Jeff Gordon took ninth, while Jimmie Johnson and Dale Earnhardt Jr. struggled mightily. Kahne is now fifth in the points standings, 70 out of first.

    “Rick Hendrick had two cars in the top 11,” Kahne said, “and two cars finish 35th or worse. So you can understand why Martinsville’s half-mile left him with a ‘half-smile.’”

    8. Jeff Gordon: Gordon let a potential win slip away at Martinsville after a pit road speeding penalty cost him the lead with about 40 laps to go. Forced to the end of the lead lap, Gordon passed enough cars to salvage a ninth.

    “It’s never pleasant when you hear the words, ‘You’ve made a terrible mistake,’” Gordon said. “But I’d rather hear it from my crew chief than my divorce lawyer.”

    9. Denny Hamlin: Hamlin overcame an early penalty in the pits and held off Brad Keselowski to win the STP 500. Hamlin led the final 28 laps and is now eighth in the points standings, 91 behind Kevin Harvick.

    “We had a tire get away from us on pit road,” Hamlin said. “The same thing happened at California. We have a fast car, but instead of burning rubber, we keep getting burned by rubber.

    “But, I bounced back and kept Keselowski at bay, winning my fifth grandfather clock. He gave me a little nudge in the final turn. Had I wrecked, you can best believe, with a clock in mind, you would have seen ‘one hand on the 2.’”

    10. Matt Kenseth: Kenseth led 11 laps and finished fourth on a strong day for Joe Gibbs Racing. Denny Hamlin won the STP 500, while David Ragan took fifth.

    “Denny ended a 31-race winless streak for Joe Gibbs Racing,” Kenseth said. “What better place than Martinsville to end that streak. I think Denny said it best after being awarded the grandfather clock when he said, ‘It’s about time.’ To all of those who thought JGR was slipping, that’s just ‘Gibb-erish.’”

  • The Final Word – Martinsville brings us NASCAR’s Sad Lexicon

    The Final Word – Martinsville brings us NASCAR’s Sad Lexicon

    These are the saddest of possible words:
    “Denny or Joey or Brad.”
    A trio of dudes who are just for the birds,
    Denny or Joey or Brad.
    First, third, and second, my hopes turned to rubble
    After watching that finish, I need a double
    Words, for this fan, that are nothing but trouble:
    “Denny or Joey or Brad.”

    Kevin Harvick was going to win at Martinsville, or so I thought. Having led 154 laps, it was a logical expectation, but he wound up eighth. Jeff Gordon was going to win, then a late caution and a speeding penalty in the pits ended those dreams and left him ninth.

    After the final re-start, the leader board was topped by the trio of Denny Hamlin, Brad Keselowski, and Joey Logano. It never changed. Sure, Hamlin did probably the coolest burnouts I have seen in a long time but…but…it was Denny Hamlin. For the 34-year old, he greatly enhances his Chase aspirations with his 25th career victory on a day the Gibbs organization probably needed. More on that in a moment.

    For Gibbs Racing, Hamlin won, Matt Kenseth was fourth, David Ragan was fifth, while Carl Edwards was 17th. It was a good day for Penske, as well, with Keselowski and Logano. Stewart-Haas had a decent day as all four were within the Top 20, with Danica Patrick claiming seventh.

    Jimmie Johnson has eight Martinsville clocks, but a car that started bad and just got worse left him having to rely on his watch to tell the time, finishing 32 laps down in 35th. Dale Earnhardt Jr. won the timepiece last year, but this time his car vibrated bad enough to snap off his shifter more than once. Then he got in a bottleneck, ran into the back of Paul Menard, and really vibrated. Junior finished minus a new clock, a hood and fenders, to sit a spot behind Johnson.

    I tried poking my tires to cause teeny tiny holes, but all that was good for was to make the things go flat. There must be an art to it, but NASCAR says maintaining consistent air pressure in this fashion, thus maintaining balance in the car, is not the way to go about it. They have suspicions somebody might be doing it, and if they ever catch that somebody it will have very bad consequences for them.

    A bit of tinkering out in California to aid the aerodynamic properties of the part-time No. 33 ride has given crew chief Slugger Labbe a NASCAR enforced three week vacation. They caught something they did not like in opening day inspection and asked for a $50,000 financial contribution as well.

    NASCAR loves its rules. A tire rolling around in a pit box without a guiding hand is enough to get them all hot and bothered. However, have a jackass stomping on his brakes at the exit to pit row, stacking up his opponents, in order to avoid having to re-start in the outside lane, and we hear not a word. To be fair, I would expect the powers that be to address Mr. Hamlin’s new trick in short order to avoid what could soon become a very unpleasant situation.

    Being sick sucks. 22 year old Kyle Larson missed Martinsville after fainting Saturday during an autograph session. He feels fine, but doctors wanted to conduct a few more tests to make sure they know exactly what happened. Regan Smith filled in, finishing 16th. J.D. Gibbs is away from his dad’s race team with what seems to be post-concussion like symptoms, but the exact cause remains a mystery. Meanwhile, recent tests did not deliver the news we wanted for pit reporter Steve Byrnes in his fight with cancer. Our prayers are with him.

    There are many folks involved in NASCAR who have come to mean something to us, including talented announcers, executives, and drivers. Some we enjoy, others not so much. More than a hundred years ago, Joe Tinker, Johnny Evers, and Frank Chance were a double play combination for the Chicago Cubs and “Baseball’s Sad Lexicon” is said to have gone a long way in getting each elected into the Baseball Hall of Fame. So, if history repeats itself, to Denny Hamlin, Joey Logano, and Brad Keselowski, you are welcome.

  • Surprising and Not Surprising: Martinsville STP 500

    Surprising and Not Surprising: Martinsville STP 500

    From the first short track of the season with the grandfather clock as the trophy, here is what was surprising and not surprising from Martinsville Speedway’s STP 500.

    Surprising: Denny Hamlin embarked on his own version of the ‘Drive for Five’ while the driver trying for his fifth championship doomed his own chances of winning with a pit road speeding penalty late in the race.

    “Well, by no means did we have a smooth race at all, and we still won,” the driver of the No. 11 FedEx Express Toyota said after his fifth win at Martinsville. “So that to me shows what we’re capable of, and once we get everything worked out the way it needs to be and we’re back to our normal selves on pit road and we don’t have any penalties and everything just runs a smooth race, we can win a lot of these things.”

    Conversely, Jeff Gordon, with an eye on a fifth championship in his last full-time season, doomed his victory chances with a pit road speeding penalty on Lap 462, finishing in the ninth position in his No. 24 Axalta Chevrolet.

    “Oh my gosh, I’m so disappointed in myself,” Gordon said. “I felt like we finally got the car, got ourselves in a position to win the race. I knew I was pushing the limit but I didn’t think I had done anything different than I had all day. I’m very, very disappointed.”

    Not Surprising:  Although Chase Elliott made his first Cup debut, qualifying his way into the show, he joined his Hendrick teammates in having unusual struggles at Martinsville.

    Elliott finished 38th after some damage sustained early in the race, while teammates Jimmie Johnson and Dale Earnhardt, Jr. suffered not only damage from incidents on the track. but also mechanical problems to finish 35th and 36th respectively.

    “A lot of guys I think were having some transmission or gear problems,” Junior said. “We got some real bad vibration in the car 30 laps into the race and it just kept breaking the shifter. It was just swinging up there like a tuning fork.”

    “It was a tough race.”

    Surprising: While Team Penske seemed to experience some moral dilemmas about wrecking, they still managed to finish in the second and third positions respectively.

    Brad Keselowski, on one hand, wrestled with his conscience as to whether or not he should wreck Denny Hamlin for the win, while his teammate Joey Logano was hoping beyond hope that Keselowski and Hamlin would wreck each other so that he could have the win and the weekend of his life.

    “I did everything I could other than wreck him,” the driver of the No. 2 Miller Lite Ford said after the race. “Morals and racing are pretty subjective, but I just felt like I raced him the way I wanted to be raced and I guess that is what it is.”

    “I was hoping so,” the driver of the No. 22 Shell/Pennzoil Ford said when asked if he thought Keselowski and Hamlin might wreck each other. “That was my only shot at it once they got pretty far away.”

    “That was the only shot I had for the win.”

    Not Surprising: In NASCAR, records are made to be surpassed and broken and both happened at Martinsville. Martin Truex Jr. continued his streak of consecutive top-10 finishes for the sixth race in a row, while Kevin Harvick’s streak of top-2 finishes came to an end with his eighth place run.

    “It is awesome,” Truex Jr. said of his top-10 streak. “I can’t say enough about the team. Again to battle like we did today. We showed we never give up. We haven’t all year long. We haven’t given up on each other since I started here.”

    “It feels good to have another good run at one of my worst race tracks,” Truex continued. “Just can’t believe we were able to stay on the lead lap, fix the power steering and all that and drive back through there. It was a hell of an effort.”

    Although Harvick led the most laps, 154 of 500, the driver of the No. 4 Budweiser/Jimmy John’s Chevrolet lost track position on a late-race restart and simply could not recover.

    “I just got hung on the outside and couldn’t get back down,” Harvick said. “By the time I got down, I was 10th or 11th.”

    “Everybody did a good job, just lost track position at the wrong time.”

    Surprising: NASCAR seems to be in significant need of recovery, with the announcement of J. D. Gibbs facing a significant health issue and Kyle Larson fainting during an autograph session.

    “We’ve been dealing with this for about six months and basically what the doctor’s say is that they really don’t know,” Coach Joe Gibbs said of his son’s situation. “J.D. has lived a very active lifestyle. All the things that he’s done in his life physically he’s loved all sporting events and it’s everything from football to snowboarding, racing cars, racing motor bikes – he’s lived in a lot of ways for him, he loved all those things.”

    “We can’t point to any one serious thing that happened to him, certainly any injury is a possibility that led us into some of the symptoms that he’s experiencing now.”

    In addition to Gibbs, Kyle Larson suffered his own surprising health symptoms after passing out prior to the Martinsville race.

    After fainting at an autograph session in Martinsville, VA, Kyle Larson was first evaluated at a local hospital in Martinsville and ultimately evaluated at a Charlotte hospital,” Chip Ganassi Racing said in a prepared statement prior to the race. “Although all tests came back negative and Larson feels completely fine, the doctors felt he should be held for more testing.”

    Regan Smith, sub extraordinaire, filled Larson’s seat and after starting from the back of the field in the No. 42 Target Chevrolet, managed a respectable 16th place finish.

    Not Surprising: In spite of scoring his first ever top-five at Martinsville, David Ragan had nothing but thoughts of Kyle Busch, for whom he continues to substitute in the No. 18 M&M’s Crispy Toyota, and his recovery from injuries sustained at Daytona.

    “I just hope I helped the 18 team for the Chase race later in the year,” Ragan said. “We’ll enjoy Easter and I cannot wait to get to Texas.”

    Surprising: Smoke surprisingly got in the eyes of both Austin Dillon and AJ Allmendinger. The two Chevrolet drivers both had motor issues that determined their 41st and 43rd place finishes.

    “I’m not sure what the exact problem was with the motor,” Allmendinger, driver of the No. 47 Bush’s Beans Chevrolet said. “I noticed some smoke start rolling in the car and I could see it start out of the back of the car.”

    “I was smoking so bad they black flagged me.”

    “Yeah it was a motor issue,” Dillon, driver of the No. 3 Cheerios Chevrolet, said. “I think the same things as the No. 47. We just have to do a better job of going through our procedures at ECR right now. We have some power but we are not finishing races.”

    Not Surprising: It was a weekend of celebration for the Gilliland family, with dad David, in his 300th Cup start, having his best run ever at Martinsville with a 25th place finish and 14 year-old-son son Todd winning his first Late Model Stock Car race at Southern National Motorsports Park.

    “I’m proud of the guys,” Gilliland, driver of the No. 38 Love’s Travel Stops Ford, said. “The pit stops were good and this was the best I’ve personally ever run here, so we’ll build from it.”

    “And I couldn’t be prouder of my son,” Gilliland continued. “He’s a great young man and a great race car driver. I think he proved a lot with his win.”

    “I’m so glad I was racing in Martinsville this weekend so I could drive down to see this race.”

    Surprising: The penalty of uncontrolled tires in the pits continued to dominate. There were five such penalties in the Martinsville race, adding to the total of 21 of these out-of-control tires for the season.

    Not Surprising: Danica Patrick about summed it all up at Martinsville. When asked, how she avoided the wrecking on the track, she asked “Well, which one are you talking about?”

    “That’s kind of the way it goes at Martinsville,” the driver of the No. 10 TaxAct Chevrolet said. “I think all four corners were banged up.”

    “It’s all a matter of luck, too,” Patrick continued. “I could have got drilled from the back and hit into the car. I could have swerved to the right and had somebody clip my right rear and spun, somebody could have been out there.”

    “Crashes are about observing where you’re at and making a good decision about where to go, but they’re also about luck. I got lucky that there was nothing in my way to get around that one. That would have probably wrecked my day.”

    Patrick finished seventh at the track known as the ‘Paper Clip’, tying her second-best career finish in the Cup Series.