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  • NASCAR Top-10 Power Rankings: Homestead

    NASCAR Top-10 Power Rankings: Homestead

    Note: The quotes in this article are fictional.

    [media-credit id=22 align=”alignright” width=”323″][/media-credit]1. Brad Keselowski: Keselowski finished 15th at Homestead, well ahead of a faltering Jimmie Johnson, and earned his first Sprint Cup championship. Keselowski finished 39 points ahead of Clint Bowyer and 40 ahead of Johnson.

    “We saw a blow out,” Keselowski said, “and a bow out, all in the same race. This is likely the first of more titles to come. I’ve already coined a slogan for our quest for the 2013 Cup: ‘2 For 2.’

    “Johnson tried to get into my head, and he did, easily. As a five-time Cup winner, he knew exactly what it took to get into the mind of a champion.”

    2. Jimmie Johnson: Johnson suffered a loose lug nut penalty, followed by mechanical issues at Homestead and finished 36th, unable to challenge Brad Keselowski for the championship. Johnson finished third in the final point standings, 40 points behind first-time champ Keselowski.

    “When I said we needed the ‘raise our game,’” Johnson said, “I wasn’t referring to being ‘jacked up’ in the garage. But I’ll take my misfortune and deal with it. That’s life. Or, as a driver with five Cup titles would say, ‘C’est la V.’

    “Keselowski earned the title fair and square. But if not pit errors and mechanical issues that resulted in a 32nd and 36th to end the season, things would have been different. As it is, I’ve got to ‘hand it’ to Keselowski, which I did.”

    3. Clint Bowyer: Bowyer finished second to Jeff Gordon in the Ford EcoBoost 400, posting his ninth top-5 finish of the year. Bowyer finished second in the final Sprint Cup point standings, 39 out of first.

    “Once again,” Bowyer said, “I couldn’t catch Gordon. That’s okay. The off-season will give me ample time to plan my vengeance down to every detail. After all, I want to ‘exact’ revenge.”

    4. Kasey Kahne: Kahne finished 21st at Homestead on an up-and-down day for Hendrick Motorsports, as Jeff Gordon took the checkered flag and Jimmie Johnson finished 36th. Kahne ended the year fourth in the point standings, 55 behind Brad Keselowski.

    “NASCAR wives and girlfriend were having babies right and left this year,” Kahne said. “Even Keselowski and Jimmie Johnson got in on the act, because a rivalry was ‘born.’”

    5. Denny Hamlin: Hamlin finished 24th at Homestead, ending a disappointing Chase For The up in fifth, 62 out of first.

    “Congratulations to Brad Keselowski,” Hamlin said. “And congratulations to car owner Roger Penske. I’m not sure if Penske is on Twitter, but if he were, his message to Keselowski would have to be ‘@ a boy!.”

    6. Matt Kenseth: Kenseth finished 18th at Homestead, piloting the No. 17 Best Buy Ford in his final race for Roush Fenway Racing. He finished sixth in the point standings, 74 out of first.

    “My car said ‘Best Buy,’” Kenseth said, “but it should have said ‘Good Bye.’”

    7. Greg Biffle: Biffle finished fifth in the Ford EcoBoost 400, his 12th top-5 finish of the year. He ended the year fifth in the point standings, 68 out of first.

    “It was an eventful year at Roush Fenway Racing,” Biffle said. “There was a lot of movement within the company. There’s a perfectly good explanation for Matt Kenseth’s departure; Carl Edward’s ‘disappearance’ is another story.”

    8. Kyle Busch: Busch finished fourth in the Ford EccoBoost 400, posting his 12th top 5 of the year and eighth of the Chase.

    “One day,” Busch said, “I’m going to put it all together. Actually, I often put it together for one day; it’s one season I have trouble with.”

    9. Jeff Gordon: Gordon won for the second time this season, beating Clint Bowyer to the stripe to win the Ford EcoBoost 400. Gordon finished 10th in the point standings, 97 out of first.

    “That’s like adding insult to insult for Bowyer,” Gordon said. “I didn’t ‘make his day,’ but I did ‘make his day worse.’”

    10. Kevin Harvick: Harvick finished eighth at Homestead, following his win at Phoenix with his 14th top-10 result of the year. He finished eighth in the Sprint Cup point standings, 79 out of first.

    “Brad Keselowski is a worthy champion,” Harvick said, “and one that is popular among fellow drivers. I think I speak for everyone, especially my former teammate Clint Bowyer, when I say that Keselowski, unlike Jeff Gordon, got what was coming to him.”

  • NASCAR Top-10 Power Rankings: Phoenix

    NASCAR Top-10 Power Rankings: Phoenix

    [media-credit name=”Simon Scoggins” align=”alignright” width=”225″][/media-credit]Note: The quotes in this article are fictional.

    1. Brad Keselowski: Keselowski took charge of the point standings with a win at Phoenix, while Jimmie Johnson crashed hard into the wall late. With one race remaining, Keselowski leads Johnson by 22 points.

    “It’s all over but the tweeting,” Keselowski said. “The race at Phoenix had so many acts of stupidity, from drivers and NASCAR officials alike, I’m not sure what had more ‘characters’—the race itself, or one of my tweets.”

    2. Jimmie Johnson: Johnson’s bid for a sixth Sprint Cup championship took a blow at Phoenix, where a late tire problem sent the No. 48 Lowe’s Chevrolet into the wall late. Johnson finished 32nd, while Brad Keselowski came home 6th and took over a nearly insurmountable lead in the point standings.

    “We just cut a tire at the most inopportune time,” Johnson said. “Up until that point, it was a ‘Goodyear.’

    “We aren’t conceding anything. However, it’s a bad sign when you see a fat lady singing about throwing in the towel.”

    3. Clint Bowyer: Jeff Gordon took out Bowyer with three laps to go at Phoenix, in response to contact initiated by Bowyer earlier in the race. Bowyer later tried to confront Gordon in the garage, sparking a brawl between crew members of both team.

    “Did you see me racing to accost Gordon in the garage?” Bowyer said. “I put the ‘sprint’ in ‘Sprint Cup’ and the ‘rage’ in ‘garage.’

    “Luckily for Gordon, Michael Waltrip was holding me back. It’s certainly not the first time Michael’s been seen hugging a man.”

    4. Denny Hamlin: Hamlin finished second in the AdvoCare 500 at Phoenix, posting his 14th top 5 of the year. Hamlin is fifth in the point standings, 62 out of first.

    “It’s a case of ‘too little, too late,” Hamlin said. “But I can look forward to next year for comfort. I’ll spend the next four months much like my pregnant girlfriend—‘expecting.’”

    5. Kasey Kahne: Kahne started fourth and finished fourth at Phoenix, posting his 12th top-5 result of the year. He is third in the point standings, 50 behind Brad Keselowski.

    “NASCAR penalized Jeff Gordon with a vengeance,” Kahne said. “He was docked 25 points and fined $100,000. I believe before he commits such an act again, he’ll think long and hard. In other words, he’ll ‘pre-meditate’ before he does it.”

    6. Matt Kenseth: Kenseth finished 14th at Phoenix, behind Roush Fenway teammates Greg Biffle and Carl Edwards, who finished 7th and 11th, respectively. Kenseth is sixth in the point standings, 74 out of first.

    “People can criticize Jeff Gordon all they want,” Kenseth said, “but I think he showed exceptional driving skill. Like a true professional, he hit all his ‘marks.’”

    7. Greg Biffle: Biffle finished seventh at Phoenix, posting his 20th top-10 result of the year. He is seventh in the point standings, 78 out of first.

    “NASCAR promoted the ‘Boys, have at it,’” policy,” Biffle said, “and they got what they asked for—the ‘Boy Wonder’ versus the ‘Bow’ Wonder.’”

    8. Kevin Harvick: Harvick won for the first time this season, taking the AdvoCare 500 at Phoenix. The win came just days after Harvick announced he will drive for Stewart-Haas Racing in 2014.

    “Along with Tony Stewart and Ryan Newman,” Harvick said, “my addition will give Stewart-Haas three of the most ornery drivers in NASCAR. Stewart likes playing ‘grab ass’ with me, and he definitely ‘grabbed’ an ‘ass’ when he signed me.”

    9. Jeff Gordon: After contact by Clint Bowyer damaged his car, Gordon retaliated by intentionally wrecking Bowyer, taking out Joey Logano in the process and nearly collected Brad Keselowski. The incident sparked a brawl in the pits, and on Monday, NASCAR docked Gordon 25 points and fined him $100,000.

    “I let my emotions get the best of me,” Gordon said. “That just happens to be the only sighting of the ‘best of me’ since my last Sprint Cup title in 2001.

    10. Kyle Busch: Busch came home third in the AdvoCare 500, his third straight top-3 finish and sixth of the Chase.

    “I’m certainly encouraged for next year by my Chase performance,” Busch said. “After not making the Chase, I was saying, ‘Wait ‘til next year.’ Now, I’m saying, ‘Can’t wait ‘til next year.’”

  • NASCAR Top-10 Power Rankings: Texas

    NASCAR Top-10 Power Rankings: Texas

    [media-credit name=”Credit: Jerry Markland/Getty Images for NASCAR” align=”alignright” width=”236″][/media-credit]Note: The quotes in this article are fictional.

    1. Jimmie Johnson: Johnson passed Brad Keselowski with two laps to go at Texas and pulled away to win at Texas, his second consecutive win in the Chase. Johnson extended his lead in the point standings, and now holds a seven point edge on Keselowski.

    “That may have been the second-best ‘restart’ of my career,” Johnson said. “The best, of course, would be the ‘restart’ to another multi-Cup championship run.

    “Of course, it was quite fitting that I fired the celebratory ‘six-shooter’ after the race, a sound which heralded my quest for my sixth Cup title. The bullets weren’t real, mind you. Judging by the number of pregnant wives and girlfriends in NASCAR this year, I must have been the only one ‘shooting blanks.’”

    2. Brad Keselowski: Holding the lead with two laps to go at Texas, Keselowski was passed on the restart by Jimmie Johnson and finished second. After leading the championship standings with four races to go, Keselowski is now seven points back of Johnson.

    “Seven points is not insurmountable,” Keselowski said, “but Johnson may be. Unfortunately, I find myself behind the ’48-ball.’”

    3. Clint Bowyer: Bowyer finished sixth in the AAA Texas 500, earning his 21st top-10 result of the year. He is third in the point standings, 26 behind Jimmie Johnson.

    “Until someone tells me otherwise,” Bowyer said, “I’ll keep racing like I have a chance to win the Cup. Keep in mind, I don’t like people telling me things.”

    4. Denny Hamlin: After his disastrous result at Martinsville two weeks ago, Hamlin finished a disappointing 20th at Texas. Deemed a threat to win the Cup just three weeks ago, Hamlin is now well out of the championship picture, 49 out of first in the point standings.

    “Our Sprint Cup championship hopes came ‘unplugged’ last week at Martinsville,” Hamlin said. “At Texas, we didn’t have electrical issues, but after finishing 20th, there was an ‘outage’—I’m further ‘out’ of the championship picture.”

    5. Kyle Busch: Busch finished third at Texas, backing up his runner-up finish at Martinsville on October 27th. It was his fifth top 5 of the Chase, and tenth of the year.

    “Just once,” Busch said, “I’d like to be dangerous in a ‘Chase’ that doesn’t involve a policeman.”

    6. Kasey Kahne: Kahne finished well out of contention at Texas, finishing 25th, one lap off the lead. He is now fourth in the point standings, 29 out of first.

    “It’s come down to a battle between Jimmie Johnson and Brad Keselowski,” Kahne said. “I’m sure Keselowski doesn’t mind hearing, ‘And then there were two.’ But I think he’d much rather hear, ‘And then there was ‘2.’”

    7.  Jeff Gordon: Gordon finished 14th in the AAA Texas 500, and is now sixth in the point standings, 54 out of first.

    “Brad Keselowski is giving Jimmie Johnson all he can handle,” Gordon said. “You could it’s a ‘handful, and then some.’ You could also say that about Jimmie’s soon-to-be growing Sprint Cup championship haul.”

    8. Matt Kenseth: Kenseth led one lap and came home fourth at Texas, posting his 12th top-5 finish of the year. He is eighth in the point standings, 65 out of first.

    “I was out of the title hunt early,” Kenseth said, “but don’t tell me I’m not a man of my word. I told Jack Roush I’d ‘be there at the end’ and I will be, because I’ve got two more races with Roush Fenway.”

    9. Tony Stewart: Stewart finished fifth in the AAA Texas 500, equaling his best finish of the Chase. He is 71 out of the lead in the point standings.

    “We’re mathematically still alive,” Stewart said, “but there’s no chance we’ll win the Cup. And don’t make me say it again. Believe me when I say there will be ‘no repeating.’”

    10. Greg Biffle: Biffle finished 10th at Texas, joining Roush Fenway teammate Matt Kenseth, who finished fourth, in the top 10. Biffle is 83 out of first in the point standings.

    “I could be the next to ‘go,’” Biffle said. “No, I’m not leaving Roush Fenway; I’m the next driver soon to be mathematically eliminated from Sprint Cup contention.”

  • NASCAR Top-10 Power Rankings: Kansas

    NASCAR Top-10 Power Rankings: Kansas

    [media-credit name=”Credit: Geoff Burke/Getty Images for NASCAR” align=”alignright” width=”224″][/media-credit]Note: The quotes in this article are fictional.

    1. Brad Keselowski: Keselowski finished 8th at Kansas, better than all but Clint Bowyer among Chase contenders. Keselwoski leads Jimmie Johnson by seven, and has a 15-point edge over Denny Hamlin.

    “It was a caution-filled race,” Keselowski said. “With Election Day approaching, it’s no surprise to see so many ‘spins.’ Even Danica Patrick got into the act. She’s just like a woman—can’t get upset without dragging a man down with her.”

    2. Jimmie Johnson: Johnson salvaged a ninth-place finish after spinning and nailing the wall in the Hollywood Casino 400. Johnson remained second in the point standings, seven behind points leader Brad Keselwoski.

    “I’ve got to hand it to Chad Knaus,” Johnson said. “He had to do a lot to get us in position for a respectable finish. It was some of Chad’s best work, but not his best. I’ve seen him do more to a car that still passed inspection.”

    3. Denny Hamlin: Hamlin finished 13th at Kansas and lost ground to both in the point standings to both Brad Keselowski and Jimmie Johnson, who finished 8th and 9th, respectively. Hamlin is 20 out of the lead in the point standings.

    “My weekend didn’t get off to a good start,” Hamlin said. “I crashed on Thursday in a test session at Kansas Motor Speedway. After that, I wasn’t sure if I was in Kansas anymore.

    “With four races left, I need to make a move. The clock is ticking. Luckily, it’s the grandfather clock given to the winner at Martinsville, where I’m always a threat to win. Hopefully, it won’t strike midnight before I put my hands on it.”

    4. Clint Bowyer: Kansas native Bowyer followed his win at Charlotte with a solid 6th in the Hollywood Casino 400, posting his 19th top-10 finish of the year. He is fourth is the Sprint Cup point standings, 28 behind Brad Keselowski.

    “Just call me ‘Clint ‘Home’ Bowyer,’” Bowyer said. “I’m sorry I couldn’t give my fans what they wanted. But they weren’t the only natives who were restless—I’m desperate for a win. I’m even more desperate for a three-car pileup in Turn 1 of lap 1 at Martinsville that wipes out Keselowski, Johnson, and Hamlin. That ‘cream’ of the crop would put me in the cream of the crop.”

    5. Kasey Kahne: Kahne scored his ninth top 5 of the year with a fourth at Kansas. He is now 35 points behind Brad Keselowski in the point standings.

    “I still have a mathematical chance to win the Cup,” Kahne said. “Unfortunately, I’m not good at math, like some drivers. Denny Hamlin, for example, is good at ‘multiplication.’ Matt Kenseth is good at ‘subtraction.’ And Kurt Busch is good at ‘division.’”

    6. Matt Kenseth: Kenseth took his second win of the Chase, and third of the year, with the victory at Kansas. Kenseth, in the No. 17 Zest car, led a race-high 78 laps and outgunned Martin Truex, Jr. at the end.

    “That’s two wins in the Chase,” Kenseth said, “but despite that, I’m still out of the title picture. Does the Chase points format need to be tweaked to place more importance on wins in the Chase? I think so, and I’ll get on a soapbox to say so.”

    7. Martin Truex, Jr.: Truex scored the runner-up finish in the Hollywood Casino 400, as his No. 55 NAPA car was the top Toyota in the field. He is sixth in the point standings, 43 out of first.

    “With no wins at all this year,” Truex said, “you could say I’m ‘55 out of first.’NAPA ‘knows how,’ except to win.”

    8. Tony Stewart: Stewart finished fifth at Kansas, his first top-5 result since a fourth at Richmond in September. He is seventh in the point standings, 47 out of first.

    “I should give Danica Patrick a lesson in offensive driving,” Stewart said. “If you want to spin someone, you can’t spin yourself. This may or may not be in the Bible, but Ice Cube once said, ‘Check yo’self before you wreck ‘yo’self.’”

    9. Jeff Gordon: Gordon led two laps and finished 10th at Kansas, joining Hendrick stablemates Kasey Kahne and Jimmie Johnson in the top 10. Gordon is eighth in the point standings, 51 out of first.

    “Dale Earnhardt, Jr. has been cleared to race this weekend at Martinsville,” Gordon said. “I wouldn’t be surprised in the people of Junior Nation commemorate the event with a new drinking game in which you drink for six hours prior to the checkered flag, then try to pass a concussion test.”

    10. Kevin Harvick: Harvick, in the No. 29 Budweiser Chevy, rolled to an 11th in the Hollywood Casino 400. He is tenth in the point standings, 59 behind Brad Keselowski.

    “When I say ‘I’m out of it,’” Harvick said, “it has multiple meanings. I’m too far behind to care, matter, or believe. The only close race I’m involved in is what I give more of—a ‘damn’ or a ‘rat’s ass.’”

  • NASCAR Top-10 Power Rankings: Talladega

    NASCAR Top-10 Power Rankings: Talladega

    [media-credit name=”Credit: Jerry Markland/Getty Images for NASCAR” align=”alignright” width=”225″][/media-credit]Note: The quotes in this article are fictional.

    1. Brad Keselowski: Keselowski survived the last-lap pileup at Talladega intact and finished seventh. He remained on top of the Sprint Cup point standings and leads Jimmie Johnson by 14.

    “It appears Lady Luck is on my side,” Keselowski said. “How else can you explain how I emerged from that mess with a seventh-place finish? So what you will, but I’ll never again complain about ‘women’ drivers.”

    2. Jimmie Johnson: Johnson’s No. 48 Lowe’s Chevrolet was one of several cars damaged in Talladega’s “Big One,” triggered by Tony Stewart on the final lap. Johnson is still second in the point standings, and now trails Brad Keselowski by 14.

    “My car was so damaged,” Johnson said, “I had to hitch a ride back to the pits with Dale Earnhardt, Jr. That was the first time a champion’s been in that car.”

    3. Denny Hamlin: Hamlin finished 11th in the Good Sam Roadside Assistance 500, one of the few cars that escaped the final lap melee unscathed. He held on to the third spot in the point standings, and is 20 behind Brad Keselwoski.

    “I lost my rear view mirror about midway through Sunday’s race,” Hamlin said. “Luckily, it was replaceable, because I couldn’t see myself winning without it.

    4. Jeff Gordon: Gordon led seven laps at Talladega and finished second, after navigating through the carnage that ensued when Tony Stewart was clipped by Michael Waltrip. Gordon now has three runner-up finishes in the Chase, but has made little ground in the point standings.

    “It appears that, despite solid finishes,” Gordon said, “I won’t be able to make up much ground in the Chase. I’m sure some will argue that the Chase format needs more tweaking to reward cases such as mine. And I would be the first to ‘second’ that emotion.”

    5. Matt Kenseth: Kenseth won in a wild finish at Talladega, pulling away for the victory as chaos reigned behind him. It was his second win of the season following his triumph at Daytona in February.

    “That’s two superspeedway wins for me in which I persevered despite major incidents,” Kenseth said. “First it was Juan Montoya starting a fire, then it was Tony Stewart starting a wreck. Just call me the ‘Master Of Disaster.’

    “It was shaping up to be a close finish, but after the crash, I ended up winning easily. With respect to my contract with Joe Gibbs Racing, you could say I won ‘going away.’”

    6. Clint Bowyer: Bowyer was in position to compete for the win in the closing moments at Talladega, but was collected in the “Big One,” triggered when Tony Stewart was turned while trying to move in front of Michael Waltrip.

    “A win was in our sights,” Bowyer said, “and would have been a big lift to our championship hopes. As it was, Tony Stewart got a ‘lift,’ in the air and on my hood.

    7. Tony Stewart: Stewart was leading on the final lap at Talladega, but with Michael Waltrip fast approaching, Stewart tried to move in front of the No. 55. It didn’t work, Stewart spun, and much of the field was affected in the pileup. Stewart finished 22nd, and is now 43 out of first in the point standings.

    “I take full responsibility for the wreck,” Stewart said. “I said as much when I took to social media to explain on my new Twitter account, ‘@fault.’

    “As you have heard, I’ve secure sponsorship from Bass Pro Shops for 18 races in 2013. I’m thrilled. I can’t wait until next year, when I can qualify first for a race and proudly proclaim it a ‘fishing pole.’”

    8. Kasey Kahne: Kahne started on the pole and finished 13th after a wild, last-lap crash that saw Tony Stewart’s No. 14 Chevy on the hood of Kahne’s No. 5 Chevy. Kahne moved up two spots to fourth in the point standings, and is 37 out of first.

    “Aric Almirola handed out 600 pounds of bacon to celebrate Gwaltney’s sponsorship of the No. 43 car,” Kahne said. “Interestingly enough, I later gave Stewart a ‘piggy-back’ ride on Sunday.”

    9. Kevin Harvick: Harvick was battling up front, with a good chance to win, when the inevitable struck at Talladega. When the dust had cleared, Harvick had an 11th-place finish.

    “The Good Sam Roadside Assistance 500 certainly lived up to his name,” Harvick said. “At least the ‘Roadside Assistance” part. Kurt Busch lived up to the name, as well, at least the ‘Roadside Ass’ part.”

    10. Dale Earnhardt, Jr.: Earnhardt finished 21st after order was restored in the aftermath of a massive final-lap crash that left much of the field in wrecked cars. Earnhardt is now 11th in the point standings, 58 out of first.

    “Despite the damage to my car,” Earnhardt said, “I was still able to give Jimmie Johnson a ride back to the pits. It felt good to be able to return the favor, because Jimmie’s ‘carried’ this team for so long.

    “Drivers may not like it, but fans love racing at Talladega. And I’m all about giving the fans what they want, as long as it’s overpriced merchandise bearing my likeness and not wins.”

  • NASCAR Top-10 Power Rankings: Indianapolis

    NASCAR Top-10 Power Rankings: Indianapolis

    [media-credit name=”Adam Lovelace” align=”alignright” width=”200″][/media-credit]Note: The quotes in this article are fictional.

    1. Jimmie Johnson: Johnson led 99 of 160 laps at Indianapolis, powering to the win in the Brickyard 400, his fourth career Brickyard triumph. He remained fourth in the Sprint Cup point standings, 27 behind Dale Earnhardt, Jr.

    “That’s ties me with Jeff Gordon for most Brickyard wins,” Johnson said. “And I’m getting awfully cozy with the bricks. One more win at Indy, and they’ll have to start calling me the ‘Brick-layer.’ And much like a brick, my championship aspirations have been ‘solidified’ in concrete.”

    2. Dale Earnhardt, Jr.: Earnhardt posted his ninth top-5 finish of the year with a fourth at Indianapolis, and ascended to the top of the point standings. He leads Matt Kenseth by 14 as the series heads to Pocono for Sunday’s Pennsylvania 400.

    “It’s great o finally be atop the point standings,” Earnhardt said. “To quote Jeremy Mayfield, ‘I can’t get any higher.’

    “Lately, there’s been a lot of talk about A.J. Allmendinger’s ‘A’ sample and ‘B’ sample. But let me tell you about some other samples that, like Allmendinger’s, always turn out positive. Those are the urine tests of the people of Junior Nation, whose ‘E’ samples never fail.”

    3. Matt Kenseth: Kenseth finished 35th in the Brickyard 400 after getting caught up in a late accident that left him 28 laps down. He fell out of the Sprint Cup points lead and now trails Dale Earnhardt, Jr. by 14.

    “I was wiped out by Joey Logano,” Kenseth said, “whom I may very well be replacing at Joe Gibbs Racing next year. On both subjects, Logano’s driving skill and my impending move to JGR, I’ll hold my tongue. ‘Mum’s the word.’ Or, in Logano’s case, ‘Dad’s the word.’”

    4. Denny Hamlin: Hamlin started on pole at Indianapolis, leading 27 laps before finishing sixth, his 11th top-10 of the year. He remained fifth in the point standings, 64 out of first.

    “As a driver who’s never won a Sprint Cup championship,” Hamlin said, “I guess starting on pole is as close as I can come to saying I ‘went out on top.’

    “But not having won since April, I’m primed for another win. And I’m always solid in the Poconos. I’m no Dale Earnhardt, Jr., but you could say I’m ‘Mountain Due.’”

    5. Tony Stewart: Stewart finished a solid 10th at Indianapolis, his 10th top-10 finish of the season. He is eighth in the point standings, 79 out of first.

    “The Chase is shaping up to be a battle between Jimmie Johnson and myself,” Stewart said. “There are eight championship titles between us. It will be a battle of epic proportions. And I’m sure this is one time when Jimmie doesn’t mind being categorized as a ‘heavyweight’ along with me.”

    6. Greg Biffle: Biffle was the lone bright spot for Roush Fenway Racing in the Brickyard 400, finishing third while teammates Carl Edwards and Matt Kenseth finished 29th and 35th, respectively. Biffle held on to third in the point standings, and trails Dale Earnhardt, Jr. by 22.

    “Kenseth may be leaving Roush Fenway,” Biffle said, “but Edwards is staying. Jack Roush isn’t the only one who believes Edwards is ‘going nowhere.’”

    7. Brad Keselowski: Keselowski led 22 laps at Indianapolis and finished ninth, one day after winning the Nationwide Indiana 250. He is ninth in the Sprint Cup point standings, 82 out of first.

    “Thanks to NASCAR for penalizing Elliot Sadler on the final restart Saturday,” Keselowski said. “Apparently, NASCAR supports my use of Twitter and social media, because they gave me one more follower.”

    8. Kyle Busch: Busch finished a distant second to Jimmie Johnson, posting his sixth top-5 finish of the year. Busch’s runner-up result boosted his Chase hopes as he moved up two places in the point standings to 11th.

    “Jimmie Johnson opened up a four second lead on me,” Busch said. “Take it from someone who knows what it’s like to go insanely fast: the only way I could have caught Johnson was with a blue light.”

    9. Kevin Harvick: Harvick finished 13th in the Brickyard 400 and still remains winless on the year. He is sixth in the Sprint Cup point standings, 78 out of first.

    “Fatherhood has put life into perspective for me,” Harvick said. “I’m calmer, more grounded, and less ornery. Trust me, everyone’s praying that the Busch brothers’ parents get grandchildren soon.”

    10. Martin Truex, Jr.: Truex finished a solid eighth at Indianapolis, posting his 10th top-10 result of the year. He is tied for sixth in the point standings and trails Dale Earnhardt, Jr. by 78.

    “Congratulations to Dale Earnhardt, Jr.,” Truex said. “I know he’s spent years trying to live up to his dad. And I think he’s on the way with the No. 1 spot in the points. Finally, Junior’s got seniority.”

  • Johnson dominates the Brickyard, sights locked on 6th Sprint Cup title

    Johnson dominates the Brickyard, sights locked on 6th Sprint Cup title

    Jimmie Johnson had an extremely confident look on his face during pre-race before Sunday afternoon’s running of the Brickyard 400. He went even as far to tweet on Saturday ” I can’t wait for tomorrow, Our car is awesome”. Jimmie Johnson proved beyond all doubt on Sunday afternoon how awesome that car was.

    On a sun splashed afternoon in Indianapolis, Johnson and the No.48 team showed why without doubt they are the favorite to win their 6th NSCS championship. Denny Hamlin set the pace early on leading the first 27 laps in which time Johnson went from 6th to 2nd and then took the lead after a pit stop. He only relinquished it during pit stops. Johnson led 99 of the 160 laps and beat 2nd place Kyle Busch by 4.7 seconds to secure his record tying 4th Brickyard win in a dominating fashion .

    Johnson and the No.48 team are quietly putting together one of their best seasons in NASCAR since his rookie season in the series in 2002, posting 3 wins,10 top 5’s, and 15 top 10’s all which are series best. He also leads the series in laps led, with 912.

    A look deeper inside the numbers tells why Johnson is the favorite heading into the chase. On non restrictor plate tracks in 2012, Jimmie’s numbers have been absolutely mind boggling. In 17 starts on the non plate tracks, he has 3 wins,10 top 5’s, and 15 top 10’s to go along with an average finish of 5.2 in those races which is the best in NSCS.

    There are 6 races to go before the 12 driver cutoff for the Chase for the Sprint Cup and by all appearances the No.48 team is really starting to hit their stride. It wouldn’t surprise this guy if they put a couple of more wins on the board before the chase starts . It seems like they unload fast off the truck every weekend and they have the ultimate X factor in crew chief Chad Knaus calling the shots from the pit box. Today’s win should put the garage on notice that this is indeed the team to beat come chase time starting in Chicago in September.

    The only thing standing in Jimmie’s way of a 6th cup series title is an October visit to Talladega. Where the plate tracks have been unkind to the No.48 team this season, but if they can navigate the treacherous close quarter racing at Talladega and come out of there with a top 10 and judging by the numbers this season on the rest of the chase tracks. NASCAR could have a very familiar face holding the trophy at the end of 400 miles at Homestead in November and that face is Jimmie Johnson. Right now I wouldn’t bet against him.

  • NASCAR Top-10 Power Rankings: Daytona

    NASCAR Top-10 Power Rankings: Daytona

    [media-credit id=22 align=”alignright” width=”246″][/media-credit]Note: The quotes in this article are fictional.

    1. Tony Stewart: Stewart zoomed past the Roush Fenway duo of Matt Kenseth and Greg Biffle to win the Coke Zero 400, Stewart’s fourth Coke Zero win and 18th overall at Daytona. Stewart started 40th and slowly but surely worked his way to the front as the night wore on.

    “I hit all my marks,” Stewart said, “and I’ve never failed a drug test. You could say ‘I’ve minded my P’s and cues.”

    “I knew I had to separate the Kenseth-Biffle tandem, and I did so. Apparently, Joe Gibbs isn’t the only one able to split up Roush Fenway teammates.”

    2. Matt Kenseth: Kenseth started on the pole at Daytona and nearly held on for the wire-to-wire finish. But Tony Stewart’s last-lap pass spoiled Kenseth’s ambitions, although he held on for the runner-up spot and extended his points lead to 25 over Dale Earnhardt, Jr.

    “Tony ran a heck of a race,” Kenseth said. “Apparently, A.J. Allmendinger isn’t the only one ‘Smoking’ in NASCAR.”

    3. Dale Earnhardt, Jr.: Earnhardt was in position to dash for the win at Daytona, but a final-lap crash sent him spinning, where he slammed the wall. He was able to guide his damaged No. 88 across the line in 15th and remained second in the Sprint Cup point standings, 25 behind Matt Kenseth.

    “It’s certainly not the first time I’ve hit a wall,” Earnhardt said. “I hit one after winning at Michigan in 2008, and felt the effects for nearly four years.”

    4. Jimmie Johnson: Johnson was bumped from behind while attempting to enter pit road on lap 125. His No. 48 Lowe’s Chevrolet slammed the Turn 4 wall and Johnson finished 36th, his third super-speedway DNF this year.

    “It appears I’m cursed on superspeedways,” Johnson said. “Therefore, I curse at superspeedways.

    “Speaking of ‘cursing,’ A.J. Allmendinger had to utter a few after getting busted by NASCAR. I would never make that mistake. Not because I’m a prude, but because I‘d never want to be the subject of the headline ‘Highs And Lowe’s.’”

    5. Denny Hamlin: Hamlin was running third with eight laps to go when he got loose entering Turn 1 and triggered a wreck involving 14 cars. Hamlin’s No. 11 Fed Ex Toyota returned to the track after extensive repairs and finished 25th, four laps down. Hamlin fell two places to seventh in the points standings, 92 out of first.

    “I may drive a Toyota,” Hamlin said, “but I don’t think anyone ordered ‘Japanese take out.’ At Fed Ex, regardless of the circumstances, we deliver. Hopefully, affected drivers can forgive me. I surely don’t want to hear other drivers whispering about my supposed lack of driving skills. I already have back problems; I certainly don’t need ‘behind the back’ problems.”

    6. Greg Biffle: Biffle led 35 laps at Daytona and was pushing Matt Kenseth on the final lap before Tony Stewart, with help from Kasey Kahne, disrupted the Roush Fenway draft and took the win. Biffle then turned down on Kevin Harvick and started a huge pileup as Stewart hurtled towards the finish. Biffle finished 21st and is third in the point standings, 44 behind Kenseth.

    “I’m sure a lot of drivers are unhappy with me,” Biffle said. “My lane change was a lot like Kenseth’s team change—I still can’t tell you where I was going.”

    7. Brad Keselowski: Keselowki finished eighth in the Coke Zero 400, following up his Kentucky win with a solid top-10 result. He is ninth in the point standings, 103 out of first.

    “As you’ve probably heard,” Keselowski said, “my Penske teammate A.J. Allmendinger was suspended for failing a drug test. That’s too bad. I like communicating on Twitter, with 140 characters. It’s seems A.J. likes communicating with ‘4:20’ characters.”

    “But I can’t discuss A.J.’s situation, despite my burning desire to talk it up on Twitter. Roger Penske told me the same thing he told A.J.—‘pipe down.’”

    8. Kevin Harvick: Harvick was caught up in a final lap wreck that likely cost him a top-10 finish, which would have been his first since a second at Dover on June 3rd. Harvick is sixth in the point standings, 90 behind Matt Kenseth.

    “How is DeLana Harvick like A.J. Allmendinger?” Harvick said. “Her urine test turned up positive as well.

    “I used to drive the Shell/Pennzoil-sponsored car. Not once did I ever have an ‘intake’ problem.”

    9. Carl Edwards: Edwards broke a five-race slump with his first top-10 result since a ninth at Charlotte, finishing sixth in the Coke Zero 400. He is now 11th in the point standings, 34 ahead of Paul Menard in 13th.

    “Despite my first top 10 in six races,” Edwards said, “Daytona left me with an empty feeling inside. How, of all people, could I find any enjoyment in a race won by Tony Stewart in Florida in which a Roush Fenway driver finished second? If I didn’t know better, I’d say this was Homestead in 2011.”

    10. Martin Truex, Jr.: Truex finished 17th at Daytona, limping to the finish after getting sucked in to a last-lap crash. Truex now sits seventh in the point standings, 92 out of first.

    “Notable casualties in Daytona wrecks included me, Dale Earnhardt, and Juan Montoya,” Truex said. “In other words, two ‘Juniors’ and a ‘Senor.’”

  • Stewart comes from the back to win fourth Coke Zero 400 at Daytona

    Stewart comes from the back to win fourth Coke Zero 400 at Daytona

    [media-credit name=”David Yeazell” align=”alignright” width=”225″][/media-credit]Tony Stewart hasn’t lost his Daytona magic and Saturday night he needed all of it to earn his fourth win in the last eight Coke Zero 400s.

    Having qualified second then failing inspection because of an open cooling hose in his No. 14 Mobile 1 Chevrolet, Stewart came from 42nd on the grid. He passed Matt Kenseth coming to the white flag and then had clear sailing the checkered flag as a wreck broke out behind him.

    An exciting finish to a race that started off atypical for Daytona. Kenseth, the Daytona 500 winner who was looking to become the first driver in 30 years to win both races, led the field to the green flag then dominated the first half of the event. He and teammate Greg Biffle stuck together and never left the yellow line.

    As they lead, many tried to get the outside lane to work. It never did. Kenseth and Biffle were simply untouchable. The first caution of the event didn’t fly until after halfway when Sam Hornish, subbing for the suspended AJ Allmendinger, spun down the backstretch after cutting down a tire.

    During the caution the action got scary on pit road. Jeff Gordon was exiting his pit stall when he and Ryan Newman made contact. Newman ended up across the nose of Kasey Kahne and spun into the pit stall of Brad Keselowski. Lucky the No. 2 crew members and officials were able to escape without injury.

    When the race restarted it looked like Kenseth was easily cruising toward another win. That was until the next caution when he had to restart at the rear of the field after losing his track position. Kenseth had been on pit road when the caution came out but had to continue through without service or be penalized.

    His misfortune opened the door for Stewart. Quickly asserting himself the leader but he would have to deal again with Kenseth on a late restart after The Big One with eight laps to go took out 14 cars, setting up a two-lap dash to the finish.

    On the restart Stewart and Kahne paired together and flew past Kenseth and Biffle. It would end up being the wining pass. Stewart headed for the finish line as 15 more cars wrecked off turn four. Jeff Burton came through for a second place finish while Kenseth, who led a race high 89 of 160 laps, finished third.

    “I don’t even remember what happened that last lap,” Stewart said in Victory Lane. “I was in that second lane and just tried to get that 17 and 16 pulled apart and once we had them pulled apart that gave us a run on the outside.

    “Just shows what Mobile 1 lubricants and oils can do for you. So good on restarts and just a weird day. I’m still hoping for a figure eight race here.”

    Stewart then acknowledged, “Anytime you win at Daytona it’s special but this Chevy was awesome. Had great Hendrick horsepower. Everybody at Stewart-Haas Racing did a great job this weekend. I’m really, really proud of our organization.”

    The win was the third of 2012 for Stewart and the 47th of his career. It’s also the 18th time that he’s won at Daytona, second only to Dale Earnhardt. And with his three wins he moves into a tie with Brad Keselowski for most on the season.

    Kenseth retained the point lead, increasing to 25 over Dale Earnhardt Jr. Greg Biffle moved back to third and Jimmie Johnson fell to fourth after suffering another DNF at Daytona.

    The 2012 Coke Zero 400 saw 12 lead changes among nine drivers and six cautions for 23 laps. The series heads to New Hampshire next weekend for the 19th of 36 races.

    Unofficial Race Results
    Coke Zero 400, Daytona International Speedway
    http://www.speedwaymedia.com/Cup/race.php?race=18
    =========================================
    Pos. St. No. Driver Make Points
    =========================================
    1 – 14 Tony Stewart Chevrolet 47
    2 – 31 Jeff Burton Chevrolet 42
    3 1 17 Matt Kenseth Ford 43
    4 – 20 Joey Logano Toyota 40
    5 2 39 Ryan Newman Chevrolet 39
    6 – 2 Brad Keselowski Dodge 38
    7 – 99 Carl Edwards Ford 37
    8 – 55 Michael Waltrip Toyota 36
    9 – 47 Bobby Labonte Toyota 35
    10 – 10 David Reutimann Chevrolet 34
    11 3 5 Kasey Kahne Chevrolet 33
    12 5 24 Jeff Gordon Chevrolet 32
    13 – 27 Paul Menard Chevrolet 31
    14 – 1 Jamie McMurray Chevrolet 30
    15 – 88 Dale Earnhardt Jr. Chevrolet 29
    16 – 93 Travis Kvapil Toyota 28
    17 – 56 Martin Truex Jr. Toyota 28
    18 – 43 Aric Almirola Ford 26
    19 – 32 Terry Labonte Ford 25
    20 7 13 Casey Mears Ford 25
    21 4 16 Greg Biffle Ford 24
    22 – 36 Dave Blaney Chevrolet 22
    23 – 29 Kevin Harvick Chevrolet 21
    24 – 18 Kyle Busch Toyota 21
    25 – 11 Denny Hamlin Toyota 20
    26 – 34 David Ragan Ford 19
    27 – 21 Trevor Bayne Ford 0
    28 – 42 Juan Montoya Chevrolet 16
    29 – 15 Clint Bowyer Toyota 15
    30 – 9 Marcos Ambrose Ford 14
    31 – 38 David Gilliland Ford 14
    32 – 83 Landon Cassill Toyota 12
    33 – 22 Sam Hornish Jr. Dodge 0
    34 – 78 Regan Smith Chevrolet 10
    35 – 51 Kurt Busch Chevrolet 9
    36 – 48 Jimmie Johnson Chevrolet 8
    37 6 50 Bill Elliott Chevrolet 7
    38 – 26 Josh Wise * Ford 7
    39 – 30 David Stremme Toyota 5
    40 – 249 J.J. Yeley Toyota 4
    41 – 87 Joe Nemechek Toyota 0
    42 – 33 Stephen Leicht * Chevrolet 2
    43 – 98 Mike Bliss Ford 0
  • NASCAR Top-10 Power Rankings: Sonoma

    NASCAR Top-10 Power Rankings: Sonoma

    Note: The quotes in this article are fictional.

    1. Jimmie Johnson: Johnson posted his eighth top-5 finish of the year with a fifth in the Toyota/Save Mart 350 at Sonoma. He is fourth in the standings, 25 out of first.

    “Clint Bowyer was solid in the 5-Hour Energy Toyota,” Johnson said. “But does that necessarily make him a contender for the Sprint Cup title? What’s more impressive? Doing it five times, or for ‘5-Hours?’

    “There’s a lot of drivers, Bowyer included, who have a single victory this year. They’re just a drop in the bucket. If five-straight Cup titles is a ‘reign,’ then one win is merely a drop of reign.”

    2. Matt Kenseth: Kenseth held on to the Sprint Cup points lead with a 13th at Sonoma. With ten races left until the Chase For The Cup, he leads Greg Biffle by 11.

    “As you know,” Kenseth said, “I’m leaving Roush Fenway Racing at season’s end. However, I’m not at liberty to discuss my contract situation. And that’s sad, because the one time I have something to talk about, I’m not able to.

    “In any case, when I do sign a new contract, it will be the first time I’ve been paid for my autograph in ages.”

    3. Dale Earnhardt, Jr.: After snapping a 143-race winless streak with a victory at Michigan on June 17th, Earnhardt followed with a disappointing 23rd in the Toyota/Save Mart 350. Earnhardt was running 13th when he spun on the final lap. He is now third in the point standings, 14 out of first.

    “I can’t be too upset for not winning at Sonoma,” Earnhardt said. “No, not because I just won at Michigan, but because Junior Nation would never forgive me for drinking wine.”

    4. Tony Stewart: Stewart passed Kurt Busch with one lap to go to take the runner-up spot at Sonoma. Stewart chased Clint Bowyer to the checkered flags, but finished .829 behind, and is now eighth in the point standings, 74 out of first.

    “The hard part was getting around Busch,” Stewart said. “He’s never easy to overtake, unless it’s in a test of mental stability. I know Kurt is struggling to find sponsorship, but I think now is the time for Planter’s to get back into sport. What better sponsor for Busch than ‘nuts?’”

    5. Greg Biffle: Biffle’s No. 16 3M Fusion was the first Ford across the line at Sonoma, finishing seventh for his ninth top 10 of the year. He remained third in the point standings, and trails Matt Kenseth by 17.

    “I’m just happy I didn’t have a confrontation with Boris Said,” Biffle said. “I surely don’t want to wake with ‘Said Head’ almost as much as I don’t want to wake up with a ‘Said Head.’ His fans are crazy, and not even my type.

    “But I finished seventh, while Boris finished 29th. And Boris, of all people, knows a ‘whuppin’’ when he sees one.”

    6. Clint Bowyer: Bowyer dominated at Sonoma, leading 71 of 112 laps for his first win of the year. Bowyer pulled away from Kurt Busch on the green-white-checkered finish, and held off Tony Stewart down the stretch. Bowyer is ninth in the point standings, 84 out of first.

    “I’m proud to give Michael Waltrip Racing its first win,” Bowyer said. “You can best believe Michael won’t stop talking about this, ever. Now I can say I’ve won one for the ‘gabber.’

    7. Denny Hamlin: Hamlin suffered difficult day at Sonoma, spinning on lap 94 after contact with Joe Gibbs teammate Joey Logano, and finishing 35th after a DNF due to suspension failure. Hamlin tumbled three places to eighth in the point standings, 73 out of first.

    “Logano wrecked me,” Hamlin said. “By the way, he’s still in negotiations for a new contract with JGR. If he’s back with Gibbs, that will be two of us resigned—Joey re-signed to a new contract, and me resigned to being his teammate for longer.”

    8. Martin Truex, Jr.: Truex led 15 laps in the Toyota/Save Mart 350 before fading to finish 22nd. He remained seventh in the Sprint Cup point standings, 68 out of first.

    “First,” Truex said, “Dale Earnhardt, Jr. wins at Michigan. Then, Ricky Stenhouse, Jr. gets a ride at Roush Fenway Racing. It appears I’ll be the final ‘Junior’ to achieve glory in NASCAR. As ‘Junior’s’ go, they should start calling me ‘Martin Truex, III.’”

    9. Kevin Harvick: Harvick finished 16th in the Toyota/Save Mart 350 after running out of gas midway through the race, costing him several positions. Harvick and the No. 29 Rheem team salvaged a decent finish thanks to the Lucky Dog free pass on lap 83. He now sits sixth in the point standings, 64 out of first.

    “This is shaping up to be a forgettable season,” Harvick said. “Of course, when I say this could be the worst nine months of my life, I guess I should clarify that it’s me talking and not my pregnant wife DeLana.”

    10. Jeff Gordon: Despite running out of gas on lap 73, Gordon battled back to record a sixth-place finish at Sonoma. NASCAR’s all-time road course win leader posted his second consecutive sixth-place result as he tries to make a move towards a berth in the Chase.

    “I hear Matt Kenseth is leaving Roush Fenway Racing at season’s end,” Gordon said. “It’s unclear whether Matt is leaving under his own accord or was pushed out. Knowing Matt as I do, I’m almost positive he was pushed.”